Posted on April 1, 2009
Please enable Javascript and Flash to view this Viddler video.
Click Here To Read The Transcript
[0:00:00]
Laura Roeder here. I have a technique I want to introduce to you today that no one else on the internet is teaching. I am the only one. Are you ready? When you do this, you are going to suck the money out of your customers. You are going to suck the money so hard; their homes are going to be foreclosed on. They will have no money left because it all went to you. Here’s what it is, the underground kitchen utensil method. What’s that? Bam! This is what it is. When you record the videos, you’ve got to get one of these. You’ve got to get your own. Don’t use the whisk, the whisk is mine. The whisk is my signature kitchen utensil. Get your own. Get a can opener or whatever. So when you record your videos, you’ve got to move it around. You’ve got to take one of this pictures like this and then once you have that picture, put it on your website, put on blog, you put it on your email newsletter. You put it everywhere. Once people know you, they know the utensil and they are cooking and they are doing their whisk and they are like oh we’ve got to spend some money, we’ve got to spend some money with Laura or they are opening their can and they are like oh I have got to spend some money. This will suck the money out of them. Signature kitchen utensil method, use it. Bam!
[0:01:06] End of Audio
Apr 01, 2009
Very useful advice. I believe this was how Food Channel started.
Kelvin Kao’s last blog post..Entering Puppet Design Contest (please vote for me!)
Apr 01, 2009
LOL. That kind of scared me.
Jon Hu’s last blog post..Hope for a brighter tomorrow, meet Jasmine Azure.
Apr 01, 2009
I call dibs on the tenderizing hammer as my utensil. Nobody else better use it!
Apr 01, 2009
A kitchen utensil is going to do all that? Wow, sounds like a middle of the night infomercial to me-lol
However I still have to go with APRIL FOOL’S!
Rob’s last blog post..Salesmanship In Print
Apr 01, 2009
Hmmm could be April Fool’s but….
I’m an expert on The Pampered Chef Food Chopper so my dibs are on that!
Apr 01, 2009
Wow. This is totally awesome.
Apr 01, 2009
Wow – what killer advice! BAM! Okay okay I claim the SPATULA!!! Like Bill Murray in Stripes – I love the spatula! yeah yeah I’ll have my customers spending money with me every time they make a hamburger, or flip a pancake, or fry some eggs.
@debworks
Apr 01, 2009
Hilarious! I claim the butcher knife and the title “The Butcher Knife Queen.”
Apr 01, 2009
I claim the wine opener – that’s a kitchen utensil right? Think of all the winos that would be sending me their money!
Sarah’s last blog post..Get your groove on with Cornielle: The Birth Of Cornelius
Apr 01, 2009
i’ll spin all the $ right out of your hands with a salad spinner. booyah!
Apr 01, 2009
This is the best thing I’ve seen all day.
Apr 01, 2009
Absolutely hilarious and very original. Perfect, April Fool’s fun.
I claim the Steak Knife for all the thick juicy steaks I’ll be eating with everyone’s money they send me! lol
Michael’s last blog post..RoyalSurf Celebrates 20,000 Members
Apr 01, 2009
Not to double post, don’t think you can edit, I didn’t claim my utensil! Ummm… Tongs.
Apr 01, 2009
I have a juicer that can squeeze the green right out of ya,lol
Justyn’s last blog post..gonaturalbaby: Top 10 Social Marketing Challenges http://tinyurl.com/cfua8j
Apr 01, 2009
I claim the spoon because that’s the utensil you’re always searching for the most.
Apr 01, 2009
Is a coffee cup a utensil? If so I’ll claim that…caffine and cash…can’t go wrong! ha ha
-Amy
Apr 01, 2009
I soooo call the ice cream scooper! A pink one to be exact! Haaha great post!
Apr 02, 2009
You are amazing… a can opener is great because you can then serve up a can of Whoop Ass! BOOYA!
I’m more of a cake mixer kind of gal… old school mint blue
Casey McKinnon’s last blog post..My Interview in Complex Magazine
Apr 02, 2009
Fork! I claim the fork. Every time you take a bite of that leafy green salad you’ll be thinking about all the Benjamin lettuce you’re going to be sending me. With each bite of your dinner you’ll be savoring the fuel you’re feeding your body while you’re sending me fuel money for my speed boat, lear jet, and maseratti. Each time you lift a bite of that luscious dessert to your mouth you’ll be thinking about the cherry on top of my bank deposits each day. The fork, that’s the ticket. I claim the fork.
Apr 02, 2009
LOL!!! i freaking love Rowdy Roeder when she appears!! You are priceless. GREAT post – great vids – great stuff. I claim the lemon squeezer (oohh naughty) Love ya Laura!!!
Marie’s last blog post..How to Turn Happiness Into Money
Apr 02, 2009
I call dibs on the potato ricer.
Apr 02, 2009
They egg beater is mine which I will use to whip my business into shape and then the money is all MINE. I LOVE the passion….BAM!
Apr 02, 2009
I changed my mind. I want the meat tendorizer, so i can smash this keyboard for not telling me my caps lock was on..:(
Apr 02, 2009
Everyone one of these comments has CRACKED ME UP! Thank you everyone! I think Lain made the best choice with the potato ricer.
Apr 03, 2009
I think you think you’re funnier than you are.
Apr 03, 2009
Bernie Madoff sez: “I swear by the sharpened spoon. Perfect for those bothersome prison yards.”
Apr 03, 2009
Signature Kitchen Utensil Method. S.K.U.M. lol.
Apr 04, 2009
I love your “I’m taking a great photo” face the best! You are too cute! Happy April Fools Day!
Apr 04, 2009
I was wondering about the stern face before the video started, then as soon as you said “suck the money” I realized it must be a gag for AFD a few days ago — charming and funny that you can do what the others DO do (“you’ll only learn this from me and you must do it!”) and it’s so NOT YOU that we all know it’s a joke ~ !
LOVE your newsletters Laura, keep up the good works ~
~TheGirlPie
Apr 05, 2009
Hmm, I’m not even sure I own a kitchen utensil. Do pizza boxes work?
Apr 30, 2009
I wish I could understand what she is saying. I am deaf and there are no subtitles. Is there a transcript somewhere?
May 11, 2010
Hopefully we can find more throughout the future few weeks.